Odd Couple
IC date: 22/03/2013
OOC date: DATE
Location: LOCATION
PCs: Codex Clean-Sweep Pop-Kettle Overhaul
NPCs: N/A
GM: N/A

The sky is dark, as usual. Grey, as usual. Drizzly, as usual. A small pile of abandoned loot lies on the rail line, probably dropped when its owner was fleeing. And a pair of raiders are fighting each other over it, weapons bared.

It's the Wasteland, as usual.

The two are duking it out, rusty harpoon versus sharpened shovel. Harpoon takes a chunk out of Shovel, who bucks Harpoon into next Wednesday. The pony — is it a mare or a colt? Who can even tell? Is it even still a pony? — leaps onto Shovel, ready to land the killing blow… and earns a sharp shovel to the gut. On the upside, his harpoon hit home. The pair of raiders keel over. Well that was useless. The Wasteland, as usual.

What may not be so usual is the terrified mare crouching in the bare bushes. … Okay, that in itself may not be unusual, but the stabe barding is. Stable 19 is emblazoned on her thin armor, her PipBuck casting an eerie green glow on her face as she curls up staring.

This was not what she signed up for.

All the while from a safe and more importantly CLEAN distrance, a mare watches the scene unfold through the lens of her scoped sniper rifle. "Hrmph that was rather pointless." she drolls standing up and streatching. Over her body from tail to hoof is hazmat Yellow Enviormental barding, her head surrounded in the protective glass that keeps her mane perfectly preserved. "I suppose you want to write something about that Codex." the mare chuckles as she trots over. "I have some cleaning up to do~" she hums happily her magic taking out some Abraxo Cleaner and a scub brush, sniper rifle left hanging on her side.

"Just because I keep a record of events and happening in my travel does NOT mean I want to write everything down, miss Sweep." Codex stumbles along behind her, not wanting to get too far away. Also regardless of what he says, he does write it down, date time and a line or two on what happened. "It really isn't pointless, everything is important, if you'd just think on it and learn." He goes over to the pile of loot, and starts to look around. "Leave this, we may find something useful."

"H…hey!" comes a squeak from the bushes. The butter-colored mare, barely out of her adolescence, stamps a trembling hoof. "Th…that's… That's my s-s-stuff! The…the…they…" She glances to the two dead ponies and blanches, eyes crossing a moment before she just…throws up in the bare bush. BLEAHG.

Sweep gives a horrified look to Codex. "Don't touch it!" she recoils from what you pull off the raider. "Not till I get a chance to disinfect it. Its on a raider I'm SURE I don't have to elaborate on where its been." the mare has already started cleaning the container the raiders where fighting over furiously with her magic humming and dancing a bit in place. "I wish you would at least try and keep clean. There is enough out here trying to kill you, germs and dysentery should not be among them! -oh!" Sweep pauses in her obsesive mission to clean "Look here Codex! A little Stable Dweller aww its so cute! Come here then. Auntie Sweep wont eviscerate you" A black booted hoof is offered to Pop as her massive sniper rifle swings about her shoulders.

Codex coughs. "Indeed, I am quite healthy I assure you. Speed is of the essence, I think." He doesn't stop mid sentence, but does give Clean Sweep a look. "You're many things, miss, but you're not welcoming, and that was terrible." He walks forward, still staying comfortably far away from Pop, he sits down. "Hello miss, I didn't mean to disturb your belongings, they are all yours. My name is Codex, historian. What is your name?" He doesn't have any weapons visible, so less 'oh my goodness huge gun' on the stallion.

Yeaaaaah. Gun, weird yellow monster, the word 'eviscerate'. Pop-Kettle squeals in terror and scrambles back from the proffered boot. Hyperventilating? A little. But at least Codex seems /safe/ and /normal/. "I— I— I'm P-P-Pop-Kettle. S…Stable Loyalty Inspector." She swallows, glancing to her stuff, and the yellow monster. Squeak.

"Codex, don't coddle the filly. You think if it where anypony else we would give them back their things." Sweep nickers and rolls her eyes pulling out a knife which she keeps in a plastic bag, then uses said knifes to retrieve an ear form each raider, and placing it in a sperate bag of its own in her pack. "If they are even her things." narrowing her eyes at the Stable pony suspiciously. "Though … i would trade her those things, if got a chance to take a SHOWER!" she almost bounces right out of her rubber horse shoes. "Oh Luna above what I would do for a proper shower every day." light on her hooves she almost dances again as she moves from Raider to raider cleaning up blood and guts and even their awful barding the best she can. All this cutting on ponies and dancing about in her half manic tone can be doing nothing good for the poor Loyalty inspector but if the insane mare notices she clearly isn't showing it. "Oooh! I am Clean Sweep dear at your service-ooh! you have a stain on your barding! Let me get that." A cloth approaches the stable pony wrapped in an aura of magic.

Codex rolls his eyes. "Sweep, we can afford some politeness, at least, can we not? We'll give her the thigns back, it's not like we need them." He looks well fed enough, seems to be doing fine. His attention drifts back to Pop. "Honestly, that mare, lovely companion so far, but still. Don't be alarmed, Pop-Kettle, she won't hurt you. I can't remember a single instance of her hurting a friendly pony. Let her indulge the cleaning habit, it's really best not to argue, I'll gather your things." He goes over to the pile, and starts gathering it up. On seeing something he deems interesting, though, he stops to inspect it, and puts it in a saddlebag, which is already overburdened. "So how did you come to be here?"

It would seem the two raiders fighting over the already-claimed goods were not alone. A few meters further out a raider starts running backwards out of an embankment of rocks, firing wildly at something in front of him. A gentle 'wrrr' echoes out and soon enough the 'fumpfumpfumpfumpfumpfumpfumpfumpfumpfump' of silenced automatic weaponry follows. A track of dust explosions quickly jumps at the raider as bullets hit the dirt before riddling a few into the raider's cheap armor and dropping him down. The firing stops and the 'wrr' begins to fade as a large pony steps out from behind the large rocks. His battle saddle has been equipped with among other things, miniaturized vulcan guns. He appears to be in his late twenties, almost all white save for his jet black hair. He looks towards the group of friendler non-raider ponies, completely silent.

Something stands out like a sore hoof. He has wings.

Pop-Kettle's possessions are few: an empty canteen, a few Fancy Buck cakes wrapped in plastic, a hoofful of lockpicks. A book: You Can Shoot A Gun! (It's That Easy!) But, no gun. No weapon of any kind, really. Pop shifts a little, though when Clean-Sweep approaches, she stiffens, eyes widening. The nice pony said she was okay. Just let her clean. "Pleasedon'tkillme," she blubbers. "I— I got kicked out of my stable! I'm t…t…too NICE!"

She's not going to last a day out here. Nope.

As firing is heard, she leaps a foot into the air, hugging onto Clean-Sweep before she even realizes what she's doing. "Wh—what's going on? Am I going to die? I'M GOING TO DIE!" Waaaail. Weep.

Sweep pouts at her friend, "I need a shower." she huffs with a heavey (booted) hoof to the ground looking rather annoyed, but she knows when she has lost an argument. "You forget the instance in Friendship City when that poor colt spilled coffee on me. He was perfectly nice but I messed him right up. Moral is don't spill, sneeze, or drip on me, and we will get along wonderfully." giving a nod to the filly before the rifle whips out at the sound of the chain guns reeving up. Her scopes line fallows over to the white stallion and she moves to cover. "Codex. While Stallion Black mane, chain gun battle saddle. We like him or is in in the book?" The book being of course a list of ponies she is meant to kill for her mysterious patron Madam Jupiter.

Codex, of course, ignores all of this. He noticed the wings., and dropped everything to prance on over. "oOh aren't you just a magnificent specimen. Wouldn't those guns limit your ability to fly? Or do you have some kind of tactical reasoning? My goodness this is rare, I simply must talk to you." You'd think he was an utter idiot. He certainly looks it, but he does at least stop far enough awya to clearly say 'no threat' and close enough to cover (whjatever good it might be) to say 'no holes'. You don't survive ilong by prancing up to heavily armed ponies, unless you are MORE heavily armed. "OH, I should write this down!" He fiddles with his glasses, and tries to write the event down in his notebook.

Overhaul, the somewhat-bulky and wide stallion turns to look towards Codex. The MV's have completely spun down and are completely silent. As his head moves, the gun on that side turns out towards the same direction…it's tracking with his head. He presses a button on his PipBuck and the gun returns to it's forward position below his wing. Seeing the other two from the group standing not to far away he turns to face towards them with lips still sealed.

Whimper. Pop-Kettle sort of peeeeels off of Sweep and falls to the ground, at the mention of messing up a pony who sneezed on the cleaner. She scrambles up though and throws herself on her belongings, sniffling as she hugs her things to her. Her only things! If she's going to die full of holes, at least it will be on her things, and not on Clean-Sweep the yellow monster, who will probably add more holes if she bleeds on it.

"Luna forgive me my partner is dumber than a rock. Little Stable Filly. When a pony has a bigger gun than you it behooves you to take cover hun. Here you can share mine." Sweep keeps her sniper rifle trained on the Battle sattled pony backing up her friend wether he deserves it or not. "Even if they seem passive for the moment, oooh do stop whimpering. Raiders like that too much." using her magic she tries to pull Pop and her things into cover. "Oh and pleeeease try not to wet yourself. Codex please stop being stupid. Obverse from a CLEAN distance!"

Codex isn't listening to you Clean Sweep lalalalalalala. "I am no threat, sir, I assure you." he draws back his robes, showing the lack of weapons. Or rather, lack of weapons except a freaking sword, and a magical energy pistol, which he places on the ground. "May I come closer? I simply must catalogue this, how exciting! I am Codex, historian, you could provide much, by what name shall I credit you?" He creeeeeps forwards.

Overhaul lets out a small grunt almost as if indicating that this isn't the first time he's been 'admired' by some curious pony. His short tail swishes once and he gives a heavy nod to the inquisitive pony, making no actions suggesting he's afraid or worried. His wings loosen up a little…as always, that's what they're drawn to. After a few still and quiet seconds, one word is muttered in response to his name…rather…one letter. "O."

Pop-Kettle just hugs her book to herself, sniffling miserably. "Th…thank you," she warbles at Clean-Sweep through her tears. "I p…promise not to wet myself. P…plus he looks nice! M…m…Mister O." Sniff. And /this/ was a Loyalty Inspector? No wonder she got kicked out.

"Don't you mean 'Scribe' Codex." Clean Sweep reminds her companion for the thousandth time he has a title. "So proud of that title when we first met not he can't recall it half the time." Sweep speaks to her little stable friend as if she too was a long time buddy on a romp through the equestrian waist. "Ooooh are you crying?" more cloth is applied to the stable ponies eyes. "I think he is just some quiet tribel who found a big gun I think its ok-oh! Look he is let Codex take a look. Poor fool is going to get himself disected if he isn't careful." giving you a motherly smile she shakes her head. "Come now this isn't that bad. No need for more tears! Yet."

Codex looks back for a moment in confusion. "Why would I be scribe Codex? I'm just codex. there's no second part to my name." With a chuckle and a 'mares' whispered to himself, he continues to walk on over. Once reaching Overhaul, he actually ignores the wings, looking over the pony's entire form. "My goodness gracious you really are a wonderful specimen." Codex moves to investigating the stallion's equipment. "A fascinating load out, I really must ask about synergy between your weapon of choice, and your wings. What kind of advantage does it afford you? Where did you acquire such wonderful equipment?" He takes a couple steps back, trying to sketch Overhaul in his notebook, badly. "And neutral as well, really quite wonderful to have met you. I didn't catch your name, may you repeat it?"

Overhaul has a bit of a look about him that says 'I'm nothing special. I'm just a pony. Why are you so interested? I'm not a miracle'. He turns his head to look back at his battle saddle and gives a bit of a shrug. Nosing a button on his PipBuck, the guns come to life again. His wings stretch out straight as if he were gliding. The guns tuck into his sides, under the wings and clear from getting in the way. Once again the only sound to come out of his mouth is a simple "O."

Pop-Kettle was doing fine. She was! She was starting to sit up and rub her nose, clear her tear-stained, dirty face. But then the guns moved. And, well. The poor stable pony just shrieks in terror, and passes straight out.

Nope. Not gonna last the night on her own.

Clean Sweep blushes deeply at the exchange, at last her rifle dropping a bit even as the guns rev. She pases a glance back to poor Pop and smiles. "I know, I know he is too dirty for his own good." placing some blanket about the filly she makes a little bed for her for the moment "He one mentioned something about a stallion equipment so scanolous I once passed out." she says almost wistfully. "Are you done making friends Codex, your studies proved too hot blooded for our little Stable Dweller's poor virgin sensibilities."

Codex blinks and turns around mid draw. "What on earth are you talking about Sweep? I was talking about his musculature. It's stunning that he's maintained it on a poor diet, unless he's found tonnes of fresh produce I am unaware of." With another eyeroll, he continues. "No, I am not done making a friend, I am gathering information. Excuse me for doing my job." He stick his tongue out, befor etunring his attention back to 'O'. "Beg your pardon, sir, I'll try to limit interruptions. That is an absolutely fabulous device you have there. You even have a pipbuck and everything, most amazing. I'd ask for your age and other things, but you don't seem inclined to share. Very well, thank you for your time." He scribbles furiously in his notebook, getting all the info down, more than Overhaul may think. Suddenly, he perks up, dropping the pen. "OH! I was wondering, do you have any spare parts? I have this computer you see?" He twists to try and get at his leg computer, pulling it up for inspection while it's stil attatched to his harness, making him bend a little bit like a banana, but a triumphant banana. "Could you be of any assistance?"

Overhaul blinks a few times. He doesn't seem to have much of anywhere else to be off to in a hurry so doesn't mind as much as some ponies might. His wings fold back in, the MV's realigning themselves for function. He takes a few slow but graceful steps towards Codex, leaning down to look closely at the 'computer' in need of repair. A second or two later he peers up at the pony and asks, "PipBuck?"

"Oh yes thats what happens when a pony eats lots of MEAT." Clean Sweep nuzzles Pop with her glass dome and trots over with her rifle and all, more sure that she isn't going to be gunned down any moment. In her head though she can't help but imagine well. Lets just say the image would make poor Pop faint again. "Colts~" she hums and goes to the newly killed raider and gets to cleaning that too. "Urge the bigger guns always leave such a mess!"

Codex seems to get more excited about the computer. "Nono, not a pipbuck, better! I started to make it myself with a pony, can't remember who, not important. It will be able to do whatever you could imagine." Momentarily he look frutrated. "Don't know where the other pony went to either, that would be helpful. I don't know much about computers, though more than your average raider. Can't remember why though, never was trained, I think, doesn't matter." He holds out the computer, offering it. "It's a pet project of mine, I've had it for… a while." He certainly seems very protective of it, and watches it like a hawk. His weapons aren't THAT far away.

Overhaul turns to look silently at Clean Sweep at the comment about adding meat to the diet. He won't admit it out loud right away, but when you need food, you need food and sometimes you have to do what it takes to get it. However, that's not as important, or as interesting, as this computer is. After diverting his gaze back to it and staring for a few seconds he grunts and gives a small nod. He actually speaks more than one word this time: "I can fix it."

Clean Seep rolls her eyes this can go on for days. "Well Codex not that you are listening but if your new colt friend happens to be and you ask later I am taking the kid back to my place. She wont survive the night without a place to rest her head." Lifting her up onto her back she starts making her way back home.

Codex waves a hoof idly. "Yeah yeah Clean Sweep, sure, I'll find my way back there." He probably won't, he forgot his map back there. He turns his eyes on the mcuh more interesting thing. "OH do be careufl with it, it's rather important. I feel a strong attacthment to it, like it's important. I'd be forever grateful if you could just get it working, turning on at least. I'll handle the rest." He relinquishes the dvice, pulling out a new notebook and writing furiously. "I really must credit you, and watch everything you do, you can do it now, can't you?"

Overhaul gives another low grunt and a nod as he continues to examine the computer. As Clean takes off with the mare on her back, he actually gives a small wave with a hoof. Soon after, his mouth opens wide in a gaping yawn…it seems he's in need of rest as well.

Codex huffs. "Listen I am only trying to be polite, at least give me your hoof print. If it will take more than now, and if you need your rest, we can meet another time." Codex doesn't even look a little tired, he has his little brain to keep him going.

Overhaul blinks slowly at the pony and lets out a quite grunt. He lifts up his right hoof as if expecting it to get stamped or recorded in some way.

Codex does all the necessary work to get the hoof print. "My sincerest thank you sir. I can see you're tired, I'll be taking my leave until another time. I often wander the wastes, you come find me whenever you are free, I can pay you handsomely for your work." He shakes Overhaul by the hoof, getting the ink on his coat, but disregards it. "You really have done me a great service, I have much information and the hopes of finishing my computer is the best news in some time. Oh my, I am rather excited, listen to me ramble, I really must be off. You have made a friend in Codex, yes indeed." He walks over to his weapons, clipping them back on. "Where was the house again?" He heads off in a random direction, which isn't the same one Clean Sweep left in.

Overhaul lets out a deep breath as he stands up, slowly walking towards the town.